Do I really know you?

 People can spend years together in a close physical relationship and never really know their partner.  Oh yes, there is dialogue that superficial stuff like:  How was your day? What’s for dinner?  How was work? How are the kids?  What shall we do this weekend?  Tonight? 

How about a movie?  That’s a great way to spend time together if you really want to get to know someone.  You don’t have to talk.  Just sit and be entertained.

Few people in intimate relationships really know their partner.  Few have emotional level conversations about a variety of issues that are important to the other person. Why not try the following little test to see how well you know your significant other or spouse.  If you can answer more than half about your partner, I will be surprised. (This is a short version of my complete Getting to Know You Questionnaire.   If you would like a copy mail me a SASE with 32c postage)  Answer the questions as you think your partner would.

1. My biggest fears are?

2. I wish I could…..

3. I struggle with….

4. I love it when you….

5. I hate it when you….

6. I am happiest when I….

7. You upset me when you….

8. I hate it when I….

9. I feel good about us when we….

10. I feel bad about us when we….

11. When I am angry I want you to….

12. My favorite movie is?

13. I wish you would do more of….

14. I wish you would do less of….

15. My favorites are:

    food

    color

    time of day

    music

    music group

    author

    fabric

    place to visit

    way to relax

There is much more but I am sure you get the point.  Real intimacy is knowing your partner so well that they never really surprise you.  Sure their will be new reactions, new growth, new desires and dreams but really knowing them takes more than just sleeping in the same bed or living under the same roof.